"Ready to be a mom?"

So, Monday I had my CD3 blood work and the ultrasound as requested by the doc. I didn't have to go in for the ultrasound at any specific time, so when I called up, they had availability that afternoon and off I went. I'll be wanting to go back in for my follow up/results talk but sitting around for 2 weeks before I can do that! My CD21 blood work is on October 2 but my appointment is not until the 19th. Now, to work on getting Jason into the doctor. He told me he has no problems with going in and providing his specimen if I check back ok, but the doc wants him in before they reveal my results. So, we'll see. I'm still deciding how to approach that. He's tired all the time now due to marching band being in full swing again. Tonight is his only night off this school week as he had practice Monday and Tuesday, an away game Thursday and more practice Friday. It only gets better when you add competitions to the mix on Saturdays in October and early November.

Monday I was at Jason's practice, as I frequently am being on the staff for the show. They were getting ready to practice stand tunes (for which I have no part in) so I decided I would leave. On my way out, I stopped to talk to Jason's colorguard instructor. He asked me how things were going and if I had planned anymore runs or triathlons to do. I told him that the triathlons were pretty much done for the year unless I want to go to Page in October for a race in Lake Powell but that I'm looking at a couple of runs and possible training for the Disney Princess 1/2 marathon in March at Walt Disney World. He asked what might stand in the way of that and I told him the obvious answer of if I was pregnant as we were ready for a baby. He then asked me "Are you ready to be a mom?" Hearing it that way, it really caught me off guard. I had just gone through the joys of bladder control and the vag cam (oh yeah, I had the surprise of that Monday as well) and was putting forth effort to have a baby. When you are set on having a baby, you might forget the other part of that... Becoming a parent. Becoming a mom scares me. It really does, but I want to do it, I want to be one. I didn't have a response at the time for him because of that realization of having a baby means becoming a parent other than the "yeah, we've been talking and we're both ready" stuff. It made me think about things afterwards and yeah, I'm ready to be a mom. I may not be ready for the challenges that lie ahead of me, but that is part of being a parent.